Everything I Ever Needed To Know About Life, I Learned As a Helicopter Tech on Seven Squadron.
Reliving my pre-loss of innocence youth. I found this a long time back, and added a bunch of penciled notes. Cleaned it up a while ago, and just found it again while clearing files. Sending to a few who might understand.
A lot of this is inside stuff.
1. Helicopters are cool!
2. A wallet in your trouser pocket can be a real pain in the arse.
3. Decisions made by someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.
4. Once you are in the fight, it is way too late to wonder if this is a good idea.
5. There is no such thing as a small contact.
6. A frozen area has nothing to do with economics.
7. Happiness is a belt-fed weapon especially if it is 20mm.
8. NEVER get into a fight without more ammunition than the other guy.
9. When you shoot your gun, clean it the first chance you get.
10.White phos can make a dull day fun.
11. The terms "Protective Armor" and "Helicopter" are mutually exclusive.
12. "Chicken Plates" are not something you order in a restaurant.
13. If you are wearing a flak jacket, the incoming will probably miss that part.
14. Dying can hurt a lot. So can Living.
15. It hurts less to die with a uniform on than to die in a hospital bed.
16. A sucking chest wound may be God's way of telling you it's time to go home.
17. Prayer may not help . . . but it can't hurt.
18. Flying is better than walking. Walking is better than running.
Running is better than crawling. All of these however, are better than extraction by a Cas-Evac, even if this is technically a form of flying.
19. It is a fact that helicopter tail rotors are instinctively drawn toward trees, stumps, rocks, etc. While it may be possible to ward off this natural event some of the time, it cannot, despite the best efforts of the crew, always be prevented. It's just what they do.
20. The engine RPM, and the rotor RPM, must BOTH be kept in the GREEN. Failure to heed this commandment can affect the morale of the crew.
21. If everything is as clear as a bell, and everything is going exactly as planned, you're about to be surprised.
22. Loud sudden noises in a helicopter WILL get your undivided attention.
23. The BSR (Bang Stare Read) Theory states that the louder the sudden bang in the helicopter, the quicker your eyes will be drawn to the gauges.
24. The longer you stare at the gauges, the less time it takes them to move from green to red.
25. If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.
26. The farther you fly into the mountains, the louder the strange noises become.
27. Running out of pedal, fore or aft cyclic, or collective are all bad ideas. Any combination of these can be deadly.
28. It is a bad thing to run out of airspeed, altitude, and ideas all at the same time.
29. Gravity: It may not be fair, but it is the law.
30.Landing in Buffalo Beans is not a good idea.
31. Eat when you can. Sleep when you can. Visit the loo when you can.
The next opportunity may not come around for a long time. If ever.
32. Combat pay is a flawed concept.
33. Medals are OK, but having your body in one piece at the end of the day is better.
34. Thousands of Rhodesians earned medals for bravery every day. A few were even awarded.
35. Hot FAF food is better than hot rat packs, which, in turn is better than cold rat packs, which is better than no food at all. All of these, however, are preferable to cold Sadza (given to you by the RAR) even if they do have the little pieces of fish in them.
36. Always make sure someone has a 9 mm Star.
37. Girlfriends are fair game. Wives are not.
38. Everybody's a hero on the ground in the pub after the fourth drink.
39. Do not fear the enemy, for your enemy can only take your life. It is far better that you fear the media, for they will steal your HONOUR.
40 Pilots always ask you to keep your eyes open?
Reliving my pre-loss of innocence youth. I found this a long time back, and added a bunch of penciled notes. Cleaned it up a while ago, and just found it again while clearing files. Sending to a few who might understand.
A lot of this is inside stuff.
1. Helicopters are cool!
2. A wallet in your trouser pocket can be a real pain in the arse.
3. Decisions made by someone over your head will seldom be in your best interest.
4. Once you are in the fight, it is way too late to wonder if this is a good idea.
5. There is no such thing as a small contact.
6. A frozen area has nothing to do with economics.
7. Happiness is a belt-fed weapon especially if it is 20mm.
8. NEVER get into a fight without more ammunition than the other guy.
9. When you shoot your gun, clean it the first chance you get.
10.White phos can make a dull day fun.
11. The terms "Protective Armor" and "Helicopter" are mutually exclusive.
12. "Chicken Plates" are not something you order in a restaurant.
13. If you are wearing a flak jacket, the incoming will probably miss that part.
14. Dying can hurt a lot. So can Living.
15. It hurts less to die with a uniform on than to die in a hospital bed.
16. A sucking chest wound may be God's way of telling you it's time to go home.
17. Prayer may not help . . . but it can't hurt.
18. Flying is better than walking. Walking is better than running.
Running is better than crawling. All of these however, are better than extraction by a Cas-Evac, even if this is technically a form of flying.
19. It is a fact that helicopter tail rotors are instinctively drawn toward trees, stumps, rocks, etc. While it may be possible to ward off this natural event some of the time, it cannot, despite the best efforts of the crew, always be prevented. It's just what they do.
20. The engine RPM, and the rotor RPM, must BOTH be kept in the GREEN. Failure to heed this commandment can affect the morale of the crew.
21. If everything is as clear as a bell, and everything is going exactly as planned, you're about to be surprised.
22. Loud sudden noises in a helicopter WILL get your undivided attention.
23. The BSR (Bang Stare Read) Theory states that the louder the sudden bang in the helicopter, the quicker your eyes will be drawn to the gauges.
24. The longer you stare at the gauges, the less time it takes them to move from green to red.
25. If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.
26. The farther you fly into the mountains, the louder the strange noises become.
27. Running out of pedal, fore or aft cyclic, or collective are all bad ideas. Any combination of these can be deadly.
28. It is a bad thing to run out of airspeed, altitude, and ideas all at the same time.
29. Gravity: It may not be fair, but it is the law.
30.Landing in Buffalo Beans is not a good idea.
31. Eat when you can. Sleep when you can. Visit the loo when you can.
The next opportunity may not come around for a long time. If ever.
32. Combat pay is a flawed concept.
33. Medals are OK, but having your body in one piece at the end of the day is better.
34. Thousands of Rhodesians earned medals for bravery every day. A few were even awarded.
35. Hot FAF food is better than hot rat packs, which, in turn is better than cold rat packs, which is better than no food at all. All of these, however, are preferable to cold Sadza (given to you by the RAR) even if they do have the little pieces of fish in them.
36. Always make sure someone has a 9 mm Star.
37. Girlfriends are fair game. Wives are not.
38. Everybody's a hero on the ground in the pub after the fourth drink.
39. Do not fear the enemy, for your enemy can only take your life. It is far better that you fear the media, for they will steal your HONOUR.
40 Pilots always ask you to keep your eyes open?
